Sunday, March 04, 2007

Eye of Newt

Looks like Andrew Coulter wasn't the only one to stick his foot in his mouth at the CPAC conference this weekend.

Here's what Newt Gingrich had to say about the victims of Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans:
How can you have the mess we have in New Orleans, and not have had deep investigations of the federal government, the state government, the city government, and the failure of citizenship in the Ninth Ward, where 22,000 people were so uneducated and so unprepared, they literally couldn't get out of the way of a hurricane.
First of all, I'd really like to hear more from Newt Gingrich about what he thinks makes for "good citizenship." We already know that his definition of "family values" calls for telling your first wife you want a divorce while she's in a hospital bed after having a tumor removed, then cheating on your second wife with a female staffer nearly 23 years younger than you (while hypocritically condemning the president for having an almost identical affair), and then moving on to a third wife.

So, do you get three tries for good citizenship too? Or are the standards higher? Probably higher, since we don't want those dirty immygints from getting in here on their third shot.

Second, I think Newt's right that it's the fault of impoverished New Orleans residents that they didn't just get out of the way of the hurricane. I mean, all the rich white people were able to load up their SUVs with a full tank of gas and tons of supplies and hightail it to hotels outside the danger zone. Just because they didn't have any money, cars, or credit, that's no excuse for the poor people in New Orleans.

Sweet Jesus, the city even opened up the Superdome for them -- not just the cheap seats, but the whole damn stadium, right down to the primo front-row spots where the best kind of people usually sit -- and they still couldn't make it out alright.

Clearly, the poor don't deserve their citizenship any longer. They had their chance, and they blew it. What a bunch of losers.

5 comments:

Jennifer said...

Don't get me started how the Jews couldn't get out of Europe in the '30's.

Mike said...

not just the cheap seats, but the whole damn stadium, right down to the primo front-row spots where the best kind of people usually sit

Nice.

Noah said...

Newt Gingrich's America scares the Bejeebus out of me. I mean, on one hand, I do get to cheat on my wife or leave her under very Seinfeldian circumstances and have that be okay. But God forbid I lose my job or expect Government services.

Otto Man said...

You should prepare for those things on your own, Smitty. In Gingrichland, we all live in well-fortified houses, armed to the teeth and surrounded by moats.

Newt Gingrich: Building a Bridge to the 12th Century.

Anonymous said...

I blame the mayor of Warsaw, Ray Naginfeld.

And is it possible that the Time Magazine caricature made Newt LESS of an odious-looking pile of excrement?