Thursday, July 19, 2007

Friday Random Simpsons - Extra Half-Assed Edition

I know how much all two of you look forward to the FRS, but I’m afraid the usual 10 has been downsized to 5, at least for this week. Maybe it’s the war in Iraq, maybe it’s the state of Social Security, maybe it’s the trade deficit, but something’s got me down. Oh wait, it’s because I ran over my laptop today. Technically, Mrs. T ran over it, but that’s because I left it leaning against the car. Yeah, I’m smart like that. On to the fabulous five!

1. Mayored to the Mob. From the 10th season, memorable mainly for featuring Mark Hamill in a dinner stage show, performing “Luke be a Jedi Tonight.” (“Homer! Use the for . . .”/ “The Force?”/ “No, the forks!”) Homer ends up being Quimby’s bodyguard, and he learns that the mayor is mobbed up. One thing Fat Tony is doing is selling milk from rats to the schools. The image of a thousand rats being milked has not left my brain to this day. 6/10

2. Hurricane Neddy. This one is all Ned, all the time, and it’s sweet (unlike those weird episodes after Maude’s death.) A hurricane destroys Flander’s house but leaves Homer’s intact, and then the town gets together to build them a house even worse than something Haliburton would build. It crumbles, Ned snaps, and then he’s admitted to a sanitarium. There we learn (through hilarious flashbacks to when he was the child of beatniks) that as a boy Flanders was subjected to a series of treatments at the Spankalogical Institute. Repeated spankings made him the annoying goody two shoes we all know and love, but repressing all his anger has made him nuts. So the docs try to unleash his anger by having Homer talk to him. Classic lines: “Past instances in which I professed to like you were fraudulent.”/” Ned Flanders, I mock your value system.”/”I engaged in intercourse with your spouse or significant other – Now that’s psychiatry!” I could go on. 8/10

3. Lisa the Beauty Queen. Classic stuff, here. Lisa realizes she’s ugly, so Homer gives up his free ticket for a blimp ride (“Hey, there, blimpy boy, flyin’ through the sky so fancy free”) to enter her in a beauty contest. Lots of good stuff here, but my favorite bit is Homer explaining to Bart why it’s good to compliment females: “When it comes to compliments, women are ravenous blood-sucking monsters, always wanting more, more, MORE!” 9/10

4. Oh Brother, Where Art Thou? From the second season, when things were starting to heat up. Still, not a great episode. Homer discovers he has a half brother, Herb. Herb is a auto tycoon, and he brings the Simpsons to Detroit to visit. He hires Homer to design a car, the car flops, the company goes bankrupt, and I don’t laugh much. Danny Devito as Homer’s half brother? No thanks. 3/10

5. The Great Louse Detective. Whew, that was a close call. I thought I was going to have a whole five straight episodes that I’d actually seen. This one, I have no clue. And it’s a Sideshow Bob episode. I usually love those. The summary sure don’t sound good, though. N/A.


sideshow bob said...

That sucks about your computer, man. I guess Mrs. T didn't appriciate that last "raising our daughter" crack.

#1 was just on TV yesterday...pretty funny, I guess.

#2. "You can't insult this call him a moron and he just sits there smiling at you moron-ily.

#3. Bart: "Wow dad, do you know anything else about women?"

Homer: "Nope, that's it."

#5 features also features the son of the late Frank Grimes...not such a bad episode.

Thrillhous said...

Yeah, I figured if anyone had seen no. 5, it'd be you, sideshow. Son of Grimes, eh? I'll have to check that out.

Otto Man said...

You had the laptop leaning against the car? Were you changing a flat?

I have to disagree with you on the Brother episode. "And I want a horn here, here and here."

norbizness said...

As the resident oldest of the old schoolers, I also must leap to the defense of #4, which is still five times better than any episode since Season 10.

1. She did things with me your mother never would... like have money for sex.

2. Herbert: Every day we're losing ground to the Japanese and I want to know why. // Advisor 1: Unfair trade practices? // Advisor 2: Mushy-headed one-worlders in Washington? // Advisor 3: Some sort of gypsy curse?

3. Herbert: Do you understand? // Homer: Sort of. // Herbert: Answer me again with self-confidence! // Homer: SORT OF!!

4. All my life, I have searched for a car that feels a certain way. Powerful like a gorilla, yet soft and yielding like a Nerf ball.

Thrillhous said...

Worse than changing a flat. I was putting the kid in the car. That's the first computer I'll have to buy because of her. First of many, I'm sure.

Forgot about that gorilla line. That's good stuff. I'll need to rewatch that episode.

Mrs_Thrillhous said...

I remember the Brother episode! (Not so for most of the episodes you guys have written about.) My memory has classified it as amusing---I'll have to watch it again to see if it elicits any laughs.

T'hous has his priorities his straight (loading up the kid first), but then it was out of sight, out of mind. What is it with men and multi-tasking?!

Mr Furious said...

Alright, I'm just gonnna come out with it...this whole damn site is the "Extra Half-Assed Edition" of late...

What's up guys? Otto, quit hanging around at KSK and earn yer paycheck!

Thrillhous has been shouldering a heavy load. And apparently, so has his laptop.

Mr Furious said...

Worse than changing a flat. I was putting the kid in the car. That's the first computer I'll have to buy because of her. First of many, I'm sure.

Still trying to picture how this all went down...

Scenario 1: Thrillhous is laying down in the driveway, watching YouTube videos of The Simpsons and Mrs. T pokes her head out the back door, "Can you put the baby in the car for me?"

Thous, "Sure, honey!" Gets up, leaves laptop on the ground behind the car, buckles daugghter into car and is distracted by a butterfly in the garden...


Scenario 2: Thrillhous is busy watching Simpsons videos on YouTube at his desk. Mrs T yells up, "Can you put the baby in the car for me?"

"I'm right in the middle of something!"

"Put the baby in the car!"

Thrillhous, determined not to miss the rest of the Swear Jar clip, carries his daughter AND his laptop out to the car, places the laptop down next to the rear tire so he can watch while buckling the baby in (upside down). Video ends, Butterfly appears.