"Awesome, more toy soldiers! You know, I wrecked all them crummy ones we put into Iraq."
"South America? That's what I thought Texas was.."
"Awww, Christ... I'm havin' another acid flashback."
"Wow, look at the nutcrackers, they're all decorated for Christmas already..."
Sweet! Life-sized Stratego!
Barbara! Are those for ME?!? This is gonna be the bestest Christmas EVER! Did you get Harriet some Judge dolls too?!? Maybe my soldiers can play with her judges!
President Bush then took out a giant magnifying glass and began trying to melt the soldiers' heads.
"I hope these guys signed the loyalty oath."
"Is this where they invented Taco Bell?"
"What if they don't like me?"
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