Part of me refuses to believe that this isn't an elaborate practical joke. I mean, Lord knows that the Swedes have plenty of indoor time on their hands, and coming up with a disco version of SCTV's "Five Neat Guys" sure wouldn't be past them. Each detail is worse than the last. The toupees are so bad they're almost certainly a violation of the Geneva Conventions, and the outfits are more disturbing than Crispin Glover.
Still, all appearances seem to be that this is on the level. The album featured here, "Stuff Party 1," has a sequel called -- get this -- "Stuff Party 2." And the band even has its own website, available for the forward-thinking and Swedish-speaking here.
It's time for the Friday Random Ten. You know the drill by now. Bust out your iPod, bust out the first ten songs that come out on random, and then, my friends, don't just stand there, bust a move. If you'd rather not stand against the wall like Poindexter, throw in a Coolness Self-Audit as well. (And yes, for quoting Young MC at length, I'm starting this week with a -3 Coolness Handicap.)
Here's this week's offering to the Rock Gods:
1. Iron & Wine, "Waitin' for a Superman" -- Sam Beam applies his usual dreamy/slipping-into-a-coma stylings to this Flaming Lips song, and the results are nicely mellow. Do not listen to this tune while operating heavy machinery. 7/10
2. DJ Shadow, "Building Steam with a Grain of Salt" -- This is from DJ Shadow's first album, Endtroducing, and it's about as mellow as it comes. Eh. I think my iTunes needs a shot of espresso or perhaps a handful of Trucker's Helper speed pills. 6/10
3. Berlin, "The Metro (live)" -- Alright, that woke it up. It's sad that most people only know Berlin for the slomo sexiness of "Take My Breath Away" on the Top Gun soundtrack, when this is easily their best song. Damn you, Maverick! Your ego is writing checks your body can't cash! 7/10
4. Edwin Starr, "Big Papa" -- I have a real soft spot for blaxploitation soundtracks, and this song comes from one of the best -- Hell Up in Harlem, the sequel to the illustrious Black Caesar. Originally, James Brown was supposed to do the soundtrack's sequel just as he had done the original, but I'm actually glad that the studio changed their mind and threw the task to Edwin Starr. This kicks more ass than Shaft. 10/10
5. Joan Jett, "Do You Wanna Touch Me" -- Speaking of asskickitude, Joan Jett struts it around here at her absolute peak. Funny, I was recently in Vegas and stumbled across a house band at the Mandalay Bay covering this classic bit of attitude. Not even they could screw it up. 8/10
6. Schooly D, "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" -- I have no idea how they got Schooly D to perform the theme song to this show, but I thank my Mooninite overlords that they did. This is the extended version of what appears on Adult Swim, which means it rolls on for a lengthy minute and a half, making homies say ho! and the girlies wanna scream. 7/10
7. Southern Culture on the Skids, "Daddy Was a Preacher But Mama Was a Go-Go Girl" -- Probably their best shot at a mainstream breakthrough, but sadly it has the sound quality of an international call made from a cell phone inside Dick Cheney's bunker. Invest in some mics, kids. 7/10
8. Replacements, "Lovelines" -- Any song that begins with the words "slightly overweight girls need sex also" and then continues to read nothing but personal ads is fine by me. This was the 'Mats back when they couldn't decide if they gave a shit or not. Which is to say, when they were at their finest. 5/10
9. The Five Du-Tones, "The Chicken Astronaut" -- This is from a great compilation of obscure '60s R&B tunes called "Shakin' Fit." They're not talking about NASA's secret plan to launch poultry into space, but rather a coward who doesn't want to go into orbit. Odd, but surprisingly funky. 10/10
10. Frank Sinatra, "The Coffee Song (They've Got an Awful Lot of Coffee in Brazil)" -- A light-hearted offering from the Chairman of the Board that speaks to the oppressive javocracy that rules many South American countries. Apparently, a politician's daughter was arrested for drinkin' water in Brazil. Who knew? 6/10
Let's see. That's 73 points in all, minus the 3 points for invoking Young MC. That gives me a 7.0 average. I'm steadily slipping from my track record of solid Cs and getting dangerously close to the D range. (Luckily, I'm taking this blog pass/fail.)
Alright, it's your turn. Drop your own Random Ten in the comments below, or else crack wise about the ones I dredged up this week.