Sheesh. Where to begin?
First, there's the mystery of Heino. I can't even make out the gender here. Part of me thinks Heino looks like David Hyde Pierce in a production of "Sprockets: The Musical!" or perhaps Dwight Schrute after an unfortunate Clorox crisis. But another part of me seizes on the flowers and the groovy necklace and thinks those crazy Teutonic eyes just might belong to a fraulein. So hard to tell, and yet I never want to know.
In case your knowledge of German doesn't extend past what you've picked up from 1960s World War II films, the album itself is called "Dear Mother: A Bouquet That Never Withered." I'm not sure exactly what that means, but the sweet poetic language of the Germans is what they're known for, right?
Anyway, the arrival of Heino means that it's time once again for the Friday Random Ten.
For those of you just now getting onto the internets, the FRT consists of three simple steps. Step One: Set your iWhatever to random and give us the first ten songs. Step Two: Rate the songs on a coolness scale from 0 to 10, with 0 suitable for Lee Greenwood and 10 for Lee Dorsey. Step Three: Profit.
Alright, here's mine for this week. Come on, big bucks! No whammies!
1. Creedence Clearwater Revival, "It's Just a Thought" -- This is one of CCR's lesser-known songs, a midtempo number with a nice organ background and some great vocal work by Fogerty. Really sweet. 8/10
2. The Roots, "I Remain Calm" -- A blistering bit of hiphop from the clearly rhetorically-titled album, Do You Want More?!!!??! Another tune with a great organ sound in the background, and, as Black Thought himself tells us, lyrically he drops the bomb! 9/10
3. Zero 7, "Give It Away" -- Some nice, atmospheric electronica here. This is pretty much the ultimate in background music, since I never seem to notice I've been listening to it until the song's over and something more starved for attention rolls up on the iPod. Zero 7: The Quiet Child. 7/10
4. Arno, "Knowing Me, Knowing You" -- This is an unfortunate cover of the ABBA song, one recorded by a guy who sounds exactly like the Witch Doctor from "Aqua Teen Hunger Force." And, sure enough, this song sounds Sofa King We Todd Ed. 3/10
5. Neil Young, "Helpless" -- There's been a whole lot of lovin' for Neil Young on the blogs lately, what with the supposedly great new documentary Heart of Gold and the imminent release of his 4,183rd album. This is a classic, though not exactly cool. Hmmm. 7/10
6. Sonny Boy Williamson, "Bring It On Home" -- A nice driving bit of harmonica blues from one of the masters. Willie Dixon wrote the tune and it shows. 8/10
7. Huevos Rancheros, "Drive Through at Molly's Beach" -- Aside from the great band name and the odd song name, there's not a lot here. Pretty generic retro surf rock. 5/10
8. Yo La Tengo, "Dreaming" -- A Blondie cover by Hoboken's finest? Sounds like a phenomenal idea on paper, but it falls short in the execution. I think the main reason is that Ira takes the vocals instead of Georgia, and he beats them right into the goddamned ground. 4/10
9. The Magnetic Fields, "Born on a Train" -- A fairly good selection from the Magnetic Fields at their peak, before Stephin Merritt apparently gave up sleeping and decided to fill the time with four different band projects. In an ideal world, this would be considered the perfect pop song. 8/10
10. MC5, "Come Together" -- A nice live track from Kick Out the Jams. If you're not well versed in the beauty of the Motor City Five, this isn't the Beatles tune but rather a much more asskickingly good song of their own. I'm not sure, but I think the song is about sex: "I am out, you are in / Let us form a link / And move in rhythms / Slide apart and slide apart / Come together / Together in the darkness / Come with me." Maybe I'm just reading into it too much. 7/10
Alright, that gives me a 7.0 average, a nice Gentleman's C. I'm not sure if I have to be a gentleman about it, though. In your face, Flanders!
Let's see what you've got this week. Drop your own FRT in the comments below, or let loose your mockery on my songs or your outrage on my ratings.