Monday, July 10, 2006

Zidane, FIFA Put the "W" in "World Cup"

You're one of the best penalty kickers in the world. If your team can hold on for just a few more minutes, you will decide the World Cup championship with penalty kicks -- against a team known for sucking at penalty kicks. So what do you do? You headbutt a guy because he said something you didn't like. You get kicked out of the game, costing your team their best penalty kicker and making those final minutes that much more exhausting for your remaining teammates. Your team comes up one penalty kick short (the guy you headbutted? yeah, he nailed his).

In reality, you have disgraced yourself and your country on the largest stage imaginable.

In FIFA, you get a gold medal.

11 comments:

Yossarian said...

for you to watch over and over again

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1i_l0OeeMc

I lover the French commentary (but why, but why?)

Smitty said...

The FIFA gold medal, it turns out after much research and International FOIA requests, has the exact same criteria as our Medal of Freedom.

Thrillhous said...

Thanks for the link, Yos. As the good people at Focus on the Family have shown us, the only way to react to something you've seen that is offensive is to watch it over and over again, and my copy of the Janet Jackson thing is just about worn out.

Let's see, Zidane did something that probably made him feel pretty good, but ended up dealing a terrible blow to his country's fortunes. Yep, that's Medal of Freedom material alright!

Mr Furious said...

Nicely done, Smitty. that's right where i was going...

A couple things... yeah, Zidane clearly lost it for a moment. there is no other explanation.

And after watching this and hearing all about the Italian antics, and seeing the slowest motion and still frames, Zidane seems to clearly hit the guy in the chest. It was not nearly as bad as it looked at the time or in full speed...that guy stayed in the game and was fine.

Final verdict? Zidane: psycho. Italian guy: nancy.

--

It should be noted that this is all of the World Cup that I watched...

Mike said...

Always fun to see a world-class athlete completely lose his mind at a key juncture. Not quite Tyson & The Ear, but insane nonetheless.

We can only image what he'd have done if a drunk Detroit fan threw a beer at him. Or god forbid, a glass of Bordeaux.

* * *

Not the only "butting" in Europe yesterday, incidently:

http://mikesneighborhood.blogspot.com/2006/07/zidane-not-only-one-to-head-butt-in.html

Thrillhous said...

Yeah, I'd put it a step down from Tyson Ear, as that also involved that inconvenient taboo of eating human flesh.

Definitely a big win for that defender. I bet he was trying to get Zidane's goose all game. I figure he said something nasty about French cuisine.

Otto Man said...

Yes, it was out of character for Zizou to give that guy a sternum crusher, but it was also hi-lar-ious.

Mike said...

Hell yeah!

The amount of "what does this *mean* for humanity?" hand-wringing that comes out of the sporting press when this kind of idiocy goes down perfectly, inversely related to the Comedy factor.

Think: Zidane's "El Toro"; Tyson & the Ear; William Ligue & Son attacking the fat first base coach; The Artest "Incident." All good for weeks worth of "serious journalism" from the illiterate yahoos that normally write about sports . . . and funnier than a rubber crutch on ice.

The Doc said...

I was sitting around at a pub with a bunch of my friends when they replayed the headbutt (for about the fifth time) on a highlight reel. We all cried out in shock and then laughed uproariously. Zidane is cuh-razy.

Pooh said...

Yes, it was out of character for Zizou to give that guy a sternum crusher, but it was also hi-lar-ious.

Not strictly true - if you recall, he stomped on a Saudi Arabian guy in the opening game of the 1998 WC in France.

Thrillhous said...

All good for weeks worth of "serious journalism" from the illiterate yahoos that normally write about sports

You said it, Mike. I really hate it when the ESPN yappers get all serious, as if their previous weeks of yukking it up and yelling "booyah" have qualified them for gravitas.