Well, look out, all you Magnuseses of the Nordic Lands. There's a new mildly-retarded pituitary case in town, and if he didn't get all queasy when it came to muscular men in leotards, he would kick your behinds. But not in a gay way.
Did you know that Pat Robertson can leg-press 2000 pounds! How does he do it?Wow! It's hard to believe a frail old man like Pat Robertson could more than triple the record for a leg press, but this is, after all, a man who can redirect hurricanes. With his mind.
Where does Pat find the time and energy to host a daily, national TV show, head a world-wide ministry, develop visionary scholars, while traveling the globe as a statesman?
One of Pat’s secrets to keeping his energy high and his vitality soaring is his age-defying protein shake. Pat developed a delicious, refreshing shake, filled with energy-producing nutrients.
There may be some unbelievers out there, but they probably don't think 9/11 was caused by gays and abortionists and the ACLU, either. What do they know? They'd probably say that the withered muscles of a batshit crazy octagenarian couldn't possibly leg press 2000 pounds. Pffft. And then they'd go on and on again about their touchy-queery "ev-o-lu-tion."
Well, they don't know anything. Too much "school learnin'" if you ask me. I, for one, look forward to seeing Pat Robertson compete in this year's strongman competition. Or, perhaps, the Special Olympics. But either way, the competition is going down!