Now that we're celebrating the third week anniversary of the Friday Random Ten, I think we're ready to take this relationship to the next level. No, I'm not going to try for second base. I am, however, going to introduce the advanced-level version of the Friday Random Ten -- a version that comes with the Coolness Self-Audit.
The rules are basically the same. Open up your iTunes, hit random, and write down the first ten songs that appear. No skipping the schlock. For the Coolness Self-Audit, rate each song on a scale from 1 to 10. (And for those of you with the works of Ms. Streisand on there, be advised, 1 is as low as you can go.)
Alright, let's get this thing going. Come on big bucks! No Whammies!
1. Eric B. & Rakim, "Paid in Full (Seven Minutes of Madness--The Coldcut Remix)" -- This is easily the best hiphop group of the '80s, doing one of their best songs. However, it gets points off for being an after-the-fact remix. Since it's a full seven minutes of madness, that sounds like a 7/10.
2. Radiohead, "I Might Be Wrong" (live) -- A scorching live version of an excellent tune. I know the band isn't exactly unknown, but dammit they're good. 7/10.
3. South (UK), "Paint the Silence" -- You'd think a group that collaborated on the "Sexy Beast" soundtrack would be ultracool, but jeebus this sounds like Coldplay. Watered-down Coldplay. 4/10.
4. R.E.M., "Time After Time" -- Easily the worst song off an otherwise classic album. Plus, the subtitle is "annElise." 3/10.
5. X, "Los Angeles" -- Outstanding punkitude. Sure, it's the closest thing they ever had to a mainstreamed song, but with good reason. 8/10.
6. Stereolab, "Super-Electric" -- A pan-European line-up playing shoe-gazing moog music? If they were any hipper, they'd implode. 9/10.
7. Black Sabbath, "Sweet Leaf" -- Great song, but I'm pretty sure the 15-year-old fry cook at Fatburger knows this one. 5/10.
8. The Roots, "Distortion to Static" -- Brilliant song by the best hiphop band of today. Plus, it's off an early album, and we all know earlier=hipper. 8/10.
9. Cocteau Twins, "Heaven or Las Vegas" -- Shut up. I like it. 5/10
10. Merle Haggard, "Okie from Muskogee" -- This is a tough one. This is perhaps the ultimate tribute to Squaresville, but it's almost so square it's actually become hip, as the great philosopher Huey Lewis might say. Hmmm. I loves me some Merle, so I'm giving it a 6/10.
Alright, adding up the score, it looks like I got a 6.2 average -- somewhere between DJ from Full House and DJ Premier from Gang Starr. Stupid Michael Stipe.
Alright, give it a whirl yourself in the comments. Feel free to give a straightforward Friday Random Ten, or else Super-Size it to include the Coolness Self-Audit.