For all of you who were worried about where disgraced former FEMA Head Michael Brown would find work in the aftermath of his staggering incompetence, worry no more. Brown has just been hired as a consultant. For FEMA. To investigate what went wrong with FEMA's response to Katrina.
We'll pause for a second so you can ask if they are, in fact, fucking kidding.
You know, I'm really starting to think that the administration's staggering incompetence is a result of the fact that Bush only knows a handful of people. Need somebody to review FEMA's mistakes? Call Brownie. Sure, he fucked things up pretty royally when he was there, but I think he's free these days. Need someone to oversee the disaster relief for the Gulf Coast? Um, let's see... How about Karl Rove? Sure, he's a political crony with no experience in that sort of thing, but that's never stopped us before! Need someone to improve diplomatic relations with the Middle East? Let's send Karen Hughes. Sure, she has zero experience with the region, and it's probably a bad idea to send Ms. Man Hands to an area not known for its love of strong, aggressive women, but Karl and Brownie are busy. I mean, who else could we send?
Meanwhile, President Bubble Boy -- last seen here -- is once again busy staffing other important jobs with friends and family members. Who should be appointed head of U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement for the Department of Homeland Security? How about Julie Myers? Sure, she has zero experience in this sort of thing, but she's the niece of JCS Chairman Richard Myers and the new bride of DHS Secretary Michael Chertoff's Chief of Staff. She's probably picked up a rough working knowledge at the dinner table. She's got to be as qualified as Janet Rehnquist, Eugene Scalia or Michael Powell, right? Or Liz Cheney and her husband? Or the various brothers of Scott McClellan, Mitch Daniels, and Ken Mehlman?
I wonder where George W. Bush got the idea that someone could and should be entrusted with a top-level government position simply because their family members had already done so. Weird.