Tuesday, August 22, 2006

But He Gassed His Own People!

More insight into the walnut-sized mind of the Decider:
He loves to cuss, gets a jolly when a mountain biker wipes out trying to keep up with him, and now we're learning that the first frat boy loves flatulence jokes. A top insider let that slip when explaining why President Bush is paranoid around women, always worried about his behavior. But he's still a funny, earthy guy who, for example, can't get enough of fart jokes. He's also known to cut a few for laughs, especially when greeting new young aides, but forget about getting people to gas about that.
I'm so glad that President Pull My Finger has restored honor and dignity to the White House.

And he's paranoid around women? No wonder.

18 comments:

Thrillhous said...

Jeez, how about a little warning for for that photo? The dessicance!!!

Mike said...

Good god, man!

And I thought you were gonna go with a little of the Merkle givin Goerge the Heisman for his unsolicited groping. Little did I know I was getting George Bush Sr.'s grandmother.

Someone find me a therapist quick. I'm convulsing too hard to look up the number.

Smitty said...

[astonished, sickened silence]

Otto Man said...

I'm reminded of what Patton Oswalt recently said at the Shatner roast when Andy Dick came up and licked his face.

"Goodbye erections!"

Otto Man said...

I know the photo scared everybody, but come on -- how about a little somethin'-somethin' for the title?

Thrillhous said...

Consider it an adjunct of Godwin's law (whoever invokes nazi/hitler first in an argument has already lost): if you put up a picture of the grim reaper's nagging mother-in-law, nobody will remember your title.

S.W. Anderson said...

And then, when I think how full of it he is all the time . . . arrgghh.

Mike said...

It is a good title, Otto.

But I was so shattered, so thrown into a fit of hysterical blindness after seeing a photo of the first woman in history to reach the age of 154 . . . I couldn't reply.

Otto Man said...

True, Mike. But you have to admit -- the Crypt Keeper does clean up well.

teh l4m3 said...

Jesus Christ. I mean, the way they describe him (and I've seen it before), the towel-snapping, fart-joke-making, keg-standing, challenging-the-elements-on-a-BMX, frat-guy type: I knew that kid in high school. WE all knew him.

And not a goddamn person really liked him. Not even his "friends."

This shit is journalism?

Otto Man said...

The worst part is that the press has totally been cowed by him. The way he singles some of them out for ridicule and lets other laugh with him -- straight out of the schoolyard bully playbook.

Too bad the reporters are still suffering from Latent Nerd Syndrome to stand up to him.

Mike said...

Too bad the reporters are still suffering from Latent Nerd Syndrome to stand up to him.

Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner. Good one, Otto.

"Oooo, pweeze, Mistah' Pwesident, lemme pway wiff you an awwl yaw cool fwiends pweeze."

Reminds me of how the lame athletes turned sports reporters line up to fellate whichever jock grants them an "interview."

Uhhh, as opposed to me: a lame athlete who dishes all over jock shenanigans even as he remains a rabid sports fan.

Otto Man said...

As Homer Simpson put it, "There are two kinds of people in college -- jocks and nerds. I am a jock."

InanimateCarbonRod said...

Gangee?

Thrillhous said...

You guys nailed it regarding the relationship between W ("O'Doyle rules!!") and the press.

sideshow bob said...

Images like that are why I'm putting off buying a high-def TV.

Mike said...

3:37 PM in my timezone, and I ain't got no nachos yet (nor any Liberty or Life either). What's up, fellas?

4 of you, and no post? I demand justice!

Otto Man said...

Ask and ye shall receive, my friend. One once, not twice, but thrice we have given new posts.