Making Censure

According to a new poll by American Research Group, voters support the idea of censuring President Bush over the illegal warrantless wiretapping by a margin of 48%-43%. As Kevin Drum notes, the most surprising bit here is the fact that even 29% of Republicans support censure.

Let that sink in. 29% of Republican voters support the idea, while about 7% of Democratic senators do.

Update: From Kos, I'm proud to report that Sen. Feingold is rubbing these polls in the faces of the press:

FEINGOLD: It seems to me appropriate, when the spin machines are out there and people are using various language, to come out and reiterate my reasons for doing this.

I think that the press decided immediately that somehow this was a bad thing for Democrats and a good thing for conservatives. The facts don't bear it out. You don't have the polls to prove it. The way my colleagues are responding to me suggests to me they're thinking about this, that they feel that there has to be some accountability.

They're thinking about this, waiting to see what their constituents think. Be sure to give your senators a call and urge them to grow a spine. You can find the direct number for every senator's office here.

Happy Anniversary!

Looks like we've decided to celebrate the third anniversary of Operation Never-Ending War Story with a recreation of how it all began:

The U.S. military said on Thursday it launched its biggest air offensive in Iraq since the 2003 invasion to root out insurgents near a town where recent violence raised fears of civil war.

A military statement said the operation involving more than 50 aircraft and 1,500 Iraqi and U.S. troops as well as 200 tactical vehicles targeted suspected insurgents operating near the town of Samarra, 100 km (60 miles) north of Baghdad.

The statement said "Operation Swarmer" was launched on Thursday morning and is "expected to continue for several days as a thorough search of the objective area is conducted."

Uh, "Operation Swarmer"? Is this somehow a tribute to this lousy Smarch weather?

Caption Contest

Yes, time for another damn caption contest.

I can't help myself. He's like a sore tooth I can't stop touchin'!

Hackett

This was my first experience with Paul Hackett. Looks to me like the Dems really screwed the pooch on this one.

Kicking Ass

Molly Ivins is mad as hell and she's not going to take it any more:

Mah fellow progressives, now is the time for all good men and women to come to the aid of the party. I don’t know about you, but I have had it with the D.C. Democrats, had it with the DLC Democrats, had it with every calculating, equivocating, triangulating, straddling, hair-splitting son of a bitch up there....

I can’t see a damn soul in D.C. except Russ Feingold who is even worth considering for President. The rest of them seem to me so poisonously in hock to this system of legalized bribery they can’t even see straight....

Every Democrat I talk to is appalled at the sheer gutlessness and spinelessness of the Democratic performance. The party is still cringing at the thought of being called, ooh-ooh, “unpatriotic” by a bunch of rightwingers.

It's all great. Read the whole thing.

(Via Pandagon.)

Sports Book

Thanks to Pete Smith, I'm happy to bring you this fantastic website which offers a rundown of political contributions made by major sports figures in the years since 1978.

There's a lot of fascinating stuff in there. Personally, I'm saddened to see that my beloved Chiefs' Super Bowl Coach Hank Stram, for instance, only gave a lousy $200 in his life -- to the Republican National Committee in '92. I guess those toupees are more expensive than they look.

Also, after taking a look at how much NBA Commissioner David Stern has given to Democrats, I am hereby retracting everything bad I've ever said about the league. I am reserving my remarks about Kazaam, however.

"Thank You, Sir! May I Have Another?!"

The Republicans in Congress have once again pulled down their pants and begged Pledgemaster Bush to spank them again. Harder, sir! Harder!!

The occasion for their latest unmanning came in the debate over the Feingold censure resolution. The Senate Republicans basically tried to do what they did to the Murtha resolution on Iraq -- distort the language to change its meaning, allow no extended debate, and bring it up for a quick vote to shoot it down -- but this time Senate Democrats wouldn't let them get away with it. (The NY Times is framing this as a defeat for the Democrats, but I think it's a wise tactical retreat.)

During all this, Sen. Arlen Specter set a new low in the history of congressional overlook:

Senator Arlen Specter, the Pennsylvania Republican who has expressed reservations about the surveillance, said Mr. Feingold had failed to make a case for censure over what amounts to a dispute over the legal basis of the program.

"The president may be wrong," Mr. Specter said, "but he has acted in good faith."

So we can break the law if we're acting in good faith? Ignorance is no defense, but warm and fuzzy thoughts are? Outstanding.

Jeez, talk about the soft bigotry of low expectations. This isn't Field Day at the local special education school, where everyone gets a ribbon just for showing up and trying hard. This is the President of the United States willingly breaking the law and promising to break it again.

And "good faith" would seem to imply that while he was doing this warrantless wiretapping, the president wasn't at the same time lying to the American people and insisting he wasn't doing anything of the sort. The new GOP line is that the president has always had the power to act like a king and ignore the law, but if that's true -- and if it is, it's news to me -- then why was the president lying about this on the campaign trail? "A wiretap requires a court order," he said in April 2004, several years after he'd been doing the opposite. Still, he insisted, "Nothing has changed."

Something has changed, alright. The Republican Congress that was screaming "rule of law!" in their rush to impeach Bill Clinton for lying about sex now doesn't care at all about the rule of law.

This president has admitted he broke the law, but like a battered wife, the Republican Congress is still insisting it was their own fault for passing such a stupid law in the first place and bothering the president when he's got so much stuff going on down at work. The president means well, and he really loves the country, even when he beats it up. You just don't know him like they do. He's a good man, officer. He didn't mean it.

Bracketology

Alright, folks. The NCAA Men's Basketball brackets are hot off the presses Greg Gumbel's silvery tongue.

Let's consider this an open thread for your predictions, problems and puzzlements. I mean, seriously -- Air Force?

Censureship

As you've probably heard, Sen. Russ Feingold (D-Balls) is planning on introducing a measure to censure the president over his illegal wiretapping on Monday morning. He was on "This Week with George Snuffaluffagus" this morning touting the plan, and did an outstanding job of presenting this as a reasoned and requisite response to the president's law-breaking. As always, Crooks and Liars has the video.

Personally, I think this is a great idea. In terms of the politics, it's a smart way to go, since it navigates between the do-nothing attitude of Congress and the high-stakes gamble of impeachment. In a midterm year when Republicans are trying desperately to find a way to distance themselves from the increasingly unpopular president, this could gain some small traction on the other side of the aisle. Not enough to pass, probably, but enough to make the issue linger.

Furthermore, having this on the table will force moderate Republicans up for re-election in blue or purple states to make it clear whether they stand with the president or with the will of voters in their home state. Think about the predicament this would pose for Mike DeWine of Ohio (where Bush's approval is 37%), Jim Talent of Missouri (38%), Olympia Snowe in Maine (40%), and John Ensign of Nevada (40%). The hardest hit, of course, would be Lincoln Chafee of Rhode Island, a state where Bush is polling at an abysmal 29%. And on our side of the aisle, this could prove problematic for Joe Lieberman, who's facing a good primary challenge from his left by Ned Lamont, in a state where Bush is at 33%.

Also, at a basic level, introducing a motion to censure shifts the political news to the question of just how much the president broke the law and just how harsh his punishment should be. This is an incredibly strong countermeasure to the moderate Republicans who are trying to employ the Whittington Principle and rewrite the law so that the president can do whatever he wants. In fact, if pushed aggressively enough, the censure call helps lump them in with the president by showing that they're his enablers in his imperial ambition.

Update: Firedoglake suggests contacting your senator to get them on board, too. You can get their phone numbers and web contact forms here.

Update 2.0: Sen. Feingold was on the Soledad O'Brien Stupid Children Show this morning, and did an incredible job of beating back her list of GOP talking points. Crooks and Liars has the video and it's worth a look. My favorite part is watching her offer a first question that dismissed censure as a "kind of slap on the wrist" and then frame a second question around the idea of censure as "a very serious matter." What an utter airhead.

Caption Contest

Time for another caption contest, folks.

I know that some people would say you shouldn't kick a man when he's down. I, however, would knock those people to the ground and kick them too.

So have at him.

"Leftist Feel-Good Hand-Wringers are Shown Reality"

When the four Christian Peacemaker Teams in Iraq were kidnapped by terrorists, Rush Limbaugh expressed glee that his fellow Americans had been taken hostage. "I like any time a bunch of leftist feel-good hand-wringers are shown reality," he said. "[A]ny time a bunch of people that walk around with the head in the sand practicing a bunch of irresponsible, idiotic theory confront reality, I'm kind of happy about it, because I'm eager for people to see reality, change their minds, if necessary, and have things sized up."

Well, Limbaugh must absolutely be wetting himself with excitement today, because one of the peace activists was just "shown reality" in a big way. He was executed.

Media Matters has the transcript and the audio clip of Limbaugh's rant. While the transcript gives you a sense of Limbaugh's contempt for his fellow Americans and his delight at their suffering, you have to listen to the audio clip to get the full flavor. Limbaugh uses a lisping, mincing voice to represent the peace activists who were over there risking their lives while he sat on his ass in the radio studio mocking them. It's pathetic.

(Both links stolen from Digby.)

Natural Causes

This just in:

Slobodan Milosevic, the former Yugoslav leader, who was branded "the butcher of the Balkans" and was on trial for war crimes after orchestrating a decade of bloodshed during the breakup of his country, was found dead Saturday in his prison cell. He was 64.

Milosevic, who suffered chronic heart ailments and high blood pressure, apparently died of natural causes and was found in his bed, the U.N. tribunal said, without giving an exact time of death.

I think I speak for everyone when I say that I'm hoping "Natural Causes" is the jailhouse nickname for Slobo's cellmate, a 7-foot tall, 300lb. Croat with anger issues.

Have fun in Hell, Slobo.

The Blurst of Times

I was just looking through my spam filter to see if it had snagged any real email. In doing so, I came across a spam email that's so poorly written it seems to have been written by a hundred monkeys working at a hundred typewriters:

Morning Loranzio,

Just heard ur partner's been complaining about u in the bed. That's why
there's, [spam website]. Lonnie and me both trying them and have
nothing but good things for them.

as also develops the theme of revenge through the dialogue between each of
the characters. Through conflict of man versus man, D. teens wait for
marriage like the Bible insists or should teens defy the rules outlined by
the Bible

thank
BillieJo

Wow. Thanks, BillieJo! Where to begin?

First of all, not only is my name not Loranzio, but I'm doubting that anyone's name is Loranzio. (Except for whoever created this site.)

Second, Malibu Stacy has not filed any complaints in the suggestion box above our marital bed, so I think they sent this to me by mistake. (And given the number of "U" and "ur" misspellings, I think it was sent by the Sex Therapist Formerly Known as Prince.)

Third, "Lonnie and me both trying them and have nothing but good things for them"? I guess part of me should be swayed by this Endorsement from Algernon, but for some reason I'm just not convinced. Maybe BillieJo could've grunted some medical statistics at me, or at the very least, given me her credentials. If Prof. Dr. Mike S. Adams Ph.D. can have them, then anyone can!

Finally, I don't know about you, but I didn't see the plot twist in the second paragraph coming at all. On one side you have the revenge sex and the hot man-versus-man action, and on the other, a mysterious group of "D. teens" -- apparently the children of former Minutemen frontman D. Boon -- who are wrestling with the biblical injunction against premarital sex. I haven't seen a twist ending like this since Hitchcock. (And "Hitchcock," according to BillieJo, is another erectile dysfunction that she can help solve.)

All in all, it's just outstanding stuff. And it makes me want to listen to Patton Oswalt's hilarious routine about semi-literate porn spam for the brazillionth time. ("The Poetry of Pornography" is available on iTunes, if you're curious. Or bi-curious.)

March Madness

With the month of March here, we've finally entered the lone sweet spot between the end of the NFL season and the start of the next NFL season -- a full frenzied month of college basketball tournaments. (Yeah, yeah, baseball freaks: I know your season runs for eleven months, starting now. Apparently, the league decided to compensate for the essential dullness of the game by making each team play 4,182 games a season. Wake me when the league championships start.)

Anyway, the magic is already underway, with the conference tournaments unfolding right now and the action spread wide. ESPN2 has the always exciting ACC tournament running all weekend long, with Miami giving Duke a scare as we speak. Meanwhile, ESPN is using the spotlight of their Original Recipe Channel to highlight the games of the Big Ten. Apparently someone in programming went to Penn State, or thinks it's still football season. It's only a matter of time before the networks get involved. (Luckily for me, I've spent the winter developing a nice ass groove in the couch.)

So let's consider this a March Madness open thread. Who are you rooting for? Who do you think has a shot at going all the way? In what specific ways would you like to see Dick Vitale tortured? (Do I have a problem with parenthetical asides?)

Update: Since the comments have turned into a debate about whether Duke's coaching staff and players are really affiliated with the dark minions of Satan or whether they're simply operating as an independent force of unholy evil, I've changed the photo to reflect the new themes. Out of respect for the Dickie V fans, I decided not to reuse this classic image.

Caption Contest

You know, when your critics are charging you with adopting dictatorial powers and the American people increasingly think you're out of touch, maybe giving a Dear Leader-style speech to your subjects courtesy of the Dumbotron isn't the best idea.

This is ripe for the picking. So have at it.

Friday Random Ten

I'm not sure how much power the truth-in-advertising laws have over album covers, but I'd be willing to wager my punching nun puppet that that Weela Gallez did not, in fact, provide "an hysterical evening" of "adult comedy" on her alleged comedy album.

Sure, she tried to make sure she had all the component elements of adult comedy -- a wacky straw fringed hat, a make-up gun set to "whore," a paper-plate-and-construction-paper clown face, and a helper monkey named Mojo -- but I don't have a lot of faith that she could pull it off. There's just something in those dead eyes that tells me she'd have all the knee-slapping humor of a Ziggy cartoon, but without the warm fuzzies.

In any case, the disturbing appearance of Weela Gallez can only mean that it's once again time for the Friday Random Ten.

You know the rules. Take out whatever it is you keep your music on, whether it's an iPod or an imitation from such brand names as Sorny, Panaphonics, or Magnetbox; set that sucker on shuffle; and give us the first ten songs that pop out. If, in the spirit of Nigel Tufnel, you'd like to take the Random Ten "to eleven," go ahead and throw in a Coolness Self-Audit as well. (If you want a guide on how to handle that, check the comments here.)

Here's mine:

1. Asheru and Blue Black of the Unspoken Heard, "Theme Music" -- What a great start to the FRT. This is some phenomenally catchy hiphop, with a killer piano groove that resembles Dilated Peoples' "Pay Attention" and lyrics that resemble Asheru's work on the "Boondocks" theme music. (Which, despite the name, this isn't.) Outstanding. 10/10

2. Al Green, "Simply Beautiful" -- Holy crap, two great songs right off the bat! At the risk of jinxing myself, let me just say this. Alright, this song is a slow, sultry groove from the Reverend Al, very understated but incredibly good. Easily my favorite thing he ever recorded. 10/10

3. Wanda Jackson, "Riot in Cell Block #9" -- Another great one, from a rockabilly pioneer who later hawked Budweiser with Brian Setzer as the "guitar granny." This was later covered to death, but the original is scorchingly hot, as a song about a women's prison riot should be. 9/10

4. Cat Power, "Who Knows Where the Time Goes" (live) -- And the fun comes to a screeching halt. This is a short and rambling song that could've passed for a sound check. Eh. 2/10

5. Catlow, "Number One" -- A nice little bit of indie chick rock, though a bit too adorable in some places. If that's possible. 6/10

6. Jane's Addiction, "Three Days" -- Once upon a time, I would've considered a ten-minute alternarock wankfest by Perry Ferrell and company to be the pinnacle of cool. I believe at the time, however, I was also under the impression that the Red Hot Chili Peppers were cool as well. 5/10

7. Chuck Berry, "You Can't Catch Me" -- A nice rollicking bit of classic rock'n'roll. This song, I believe, has the distinction of being the only rock tune from the late '50s and early '60s to focus on the freedom felt by American youth as a result of driving a car. It's a shame more people didn't explore this field. 7/10

8. Drive-By Truckers, "Ronnie and Neil" -- As I said over at Norbizness's pad, the Truckers are a band that many of my friends love and the critics adore, but I just can't get into them. The singer sounds like he's gargling asphalt and the deep lyrics are just too damn preachy. I just don't get it. 3/10

9. Mahlathini & Mahotella Queens, "Thuto Kelefa" -- Now, I have no idea what Malathini is saying either, but who cares? Incredibly limber guitar work, lush background vocals from the Queens, and the gruff Howlin' Wolf style of the man himself. Like a Colt .45, this works every time. 8/10

10. Bobby Bland, "Ain't No Love in the Heart of the City" -- A fairly good bit of '70s soul. This seems like the kind of thing that Slaughter or Shaft would have playing in the background as they walked to work. 7/10

Well, after a tremendous start, I slipped up a couple times and still wound up with a 6.7. I'm apparently two-thirds cool, much in the same way Wilson Phillips was two-thirds hot.

Let's see what you've got. Drop your own FRT in the comments below, add your snarky comments about my own random array of songs, or perhaps offer a haiku about the Bush administration's incompetence. Your choice.

Fuck Off and Die

The Bush Administration's war on science has been well documented, and I won't rehash all the incredibly sad stories about how politics trumps facts in the Republican party.

But here's one little blurb that I came across in the March 13 issue of the New Yorker. It's not online, so I can't link it.

It begins by recounting the story of the development of a vaccine against human papillomavirus (HPV). HPV is spread by sexual contact; there are a hundred strains of this virus; two cause cervical cancer and two others gential warts. Merck came up with a vaccine that successfully protected people against the four nasty strains. Good news, right? We wipe out a nasty bug and big pharma gets some ka-ching. Everyone's happy.

Wrong.

Bushco decided that we would rather have people die of cancer than "encourage" kids to have sex. That's not a joke; I swear that was their argument.

That part I knew about, but I had no idea how deeply these sickos' hatred of their fellow human beings ran. If there is any doubt how deeply un-Christian these people are, this paragraph should show you the light.

Here's the last paragraph on page 60. It's my transcription, so I apologize for any misspellings, grammatical errors, etc.:

Religious conservatives are unapologetic; not only do they believe that mass use of an HPV vaccine or the availability of emergency contraception will encourage adolescents to engage in unacceptable sexual behavior; some have even stated that they would feel similarly about an H.I.V. vaccine, if one became available. "We would have to look at that closely," Reginald Finger, an evangelical Christian and former medical adviser to the conservative political organization Focus on the Family, said. "With any new vaccine for H.I.V., disinhibition" - a medical term for the absence of fear - "would certainly be a factor, and it is something we will have to pay attention to with a great deal of care." Finger sits on the Centers for Disease Control's Immunization Committee, which makes those recommendations.

Did you get that? If an effective vaccine for H.I.V. was invented tomorrow, there would be a debate on whether or not to release it to Americans because the citizens of this country cannot exhibit any self-control. Thank you Government! You're saving me from myself; Lord knows the only thing keeping me from sodomizing prostitutes while sharing heroin needles is the threat of AIDS. Now we just have to get rid of the hepatitis vaccine...

What a bunch of sick fucks.

I'd also like to point out this wasn't a yahoo on the street talking through a crystal meth haze. This man was appointed by the President of the United States of America to a committee that oversees this very issue!

Truth, Justice, and the American Way just ain't what it used to be.

Stupid Like a Fox!

Words fail me. Check out this actual, real, serious campaign commercial from North Carolina congressional candidate Vernon Robinson.

Apparently, when he styled himself as "the black Jesse Helms" he really meant it. Insane.

Congressional Overlook

The latest news in the warrantless wiretapping is in, and it's absofuckinglutely pathetic:

Support was building among Republicans and the White House on Tuesday for a proposal from several moderate senators that would give President Bush's controversial surveillance program the force of law, more than four years after he secretly initiated the program.

In other words, after it became clear that the president -- by his own admission -- had broken the law and violated American civil liberties in the most serious way, that he had knowingly lied about it on the campaign trail, and that he boasted that he was right to break the law and would continue to break the law anytime he damn well saw fit, the Republicans in Congress have responded not by staging a full investigation or initiating impeachment procedures, but by rewriting the law so that what Bush wants to do is now legal. Unbelievable.

The Republican Congress is like an ass-kissing, mid-level management type at a major corporation. They volunteer to work as the umpire at the company softball game, because they hope the boss will notice them. And sure enough, when the boss steps up to the plate, he can do no wrong. No matter what he does -- bludgeon the catcher with the bat, swing and miss a dozen times, or simply stand there and soil his pants -- that will not only be allowed, rulebook be damned, but will be rewarded with a dozen runs. Two dozen if the catcher dies.

But back to our story:

The move allowed Republicans on the Senate Intelligence Committee to support efforts to craft eavesdropping legislation and conduct additional oversight. It also blunted Democratic calls for an investigation of the U.S.-based monitoring operations in the Senate Intelligence Committee.

Committee Chairman Pat Roberts, R-Kan., said the legislation proposed by several moderate Republicans was "certainly a good foundation to start with" — a sentiment shared by the Senate's Republican leadership and the White House, he said.

So not only is this a cave in by the moderate Republicans, but what we're likely to end up with here is going to be even more watered down. The idea of Pat Roberts acting like some sort of independent check on the administration is surreal. If Roberts were any more of a kiss-ass to this president, he'd have to have his lips surgically attached to the president's oval orifice itself.

The piece tries to present the moderate Republicans as rebelling in some way:

CBS News has learned that the Republicans argued their case all the way up the chain of command, including the vice president's office. CBS News correspondent Gloria Borger reports some Republican senators threatened to join Democrats in calling for a public investigation into the wiretap program if the White House didn't support congressional oversight.

After weeks of negotiations and closed door meetings, Sen. Mike DeWine, R-Ohio, said he would soon introduce the Terrorist Surveillance Act of 2006 with three other moderates who have helped shaped the debate on intelligence issues: Sens. Chuck Hagel of Nebraska, Olympia Snowe of Maine and Lindsey Graham of South Carolina.

"I think today we're setting a constitutional marker and also a constitutional check on presidential power because you can't allow the president to move forward with unfettered fashion," said Snowe.

I'm glad to know they took this to the top level of the administration -- the VP's office -- but the delusion that they somehow spoke truth to power and reasserted their rightful place as the overseers of executive action is complete and utter bullshit.

This isn't oversight. This is overlook.

They're overlooking the fact that the president broke the law, admitted he broke the law, and promised to break the law again. In response, without holding meaningful hearings, conducting their own investigations, or doing anything else contained in their job descriptions, they're simply going to rewrite the rules so that Bush can keep on doing what he's doing. They'll overlook what he's done in the past, and with this new toothless law, they'll be able to overlook what he does in the future.

They're also overlooking the Constitution. This isn't some arcane legal matter that scholars are hopelessly divided on. This is a goddamned law, passed by Congress back when it actually gave a damn about the kinds of things we pay only lip service to these days -- freedom, democracy, the rule of law, and so on. Legal scholars (with the exception of John Yoo, Dictatorial Enabler) are, in this matter, universally in agreement that the president broke the law.

What we're seeing here is the Harry Whittington Principle. The president shot the law in the face, and the Republicans in Congress are making sure that the law apologizes to the president for getting in his way.

Something Said. Something Not Good

Why doesn't this surprise me?*

A high school social studies teacher who was put on leave after comparing President Bush's State of the Union address to speeches made by Adolf Hitler defended his lecture on Tuesday, saying he was trying to encourage students to think.

*I think it's mostly a mistake to make comparisons between Hitler/Nazis and a modern U.S. politician because the magnitude of Hitler's/Nazi's evilness is so incredibly great. However, this particular case seems to be an exception, as the teacher focused on the language of their respective speeches rather than on the men themselves.

You Truly Belong with Us, Here among the Clouds

I love Star Wars as much as the next nerd, but this man was doomed the second his parents filled out the birth certificate.

Landocalrissan Butler, 25, of Winnikee Avenue, entered a guilty plea Tuesday in Dutchess County Court to attempted criminal possession of a controlled substance, a felony. Butler told Judge Thomas J. Dolan he had five small bags of crack in his pocket Dec. 22 when police arrested him on Morgan Avenue. He said he intended to sell the drugs.

Elephant in the Room

Those Who Don't Learn from History...

Uh oh. It looks like some Scots are thinking about blowing up a whale.

The rotting carcase of a 48ft sperm whale stranded in the Hebrides may have to be blown up with explosives, environmental officers said yesterday.

I hope someone mentions that this has been tried before with hilarious results.

Cheney is Right

You better start saving your money.

The move to freeze pensions at solid, profitable companies like Verizon—and at others, including IBM, Sprint, Nextel, Tribune Corp., Lexmark, Alcoa and Russell Corp.—is the latest sign of pressure on traditional guaranteed pension plans. "It's an entirely new phenomenon for healthy companies to freeze their pensions," says Alicia Munnell, director of the Center for Retirement Research at Boston College.

In 2003, 41 percent of workers with pension coverage had defined benefit pensions, down from 83 percent in 1980, according to the latest data released in February by the center. For the last several years, employees in struggling industries such as airlines, steel, coal and textiles have watched as their firms declared bankruptcy and terminated their plans altogether. And more may be in trouble, particularly in industries such as auto parts.

Not only that, new regulatory and legislative changes now in the works could encourage companies to freeze their pensions—or get out of the pension business altogether. And questions are being raised about the funding of pensions for public-sector employees.

Yeah, about those public sector pensions...

Treasury Secretary John Snow notified Congress yesterday that the administration had taken "all prudent and legal actions," including tapping certain government retirement funds, to keep from hitting the $8.2 trillion national-debt limit.

Caption Contest

Speaking of musicians who've passed away, iRod sent me this disturbing photo of Eddie Van Halen this morning. Man, I thought David Lee Roth looked bad.

Anyway, it's perfect fodder for another caption contest. Bring it.

Ali Farka Toure

Today is a sad one. In addition to creating beautiful music, lived a fascinating life.

Born Ali Ibrahim in 1939 in the village of Kanau on the banks of the River Niger in northwest Mali, he never knew his exact date of birth. The tenth son born to parents who claimed noble descent, he was the first to survive infancy and as a child acquired the nickname Farka, meaning donkey and indicating not slow-wittedness but strength and tenacity...

For a time, he planned to becoming a priest, not in his Islamic faith but in the local djinn-based religion, before he eventually decided the powers of the spirit world were too dangerous to meddle with. “These spirits can be good or bad to you, so I decided just to sing about them,” he explained many years later. “But it’s our culture, so we can’t pass it by.” As a teenager, he worked variously as an apprentice to a tailor, a taxi driver, car mechanic and a pilot on the river, while continuing to play music in spiritual ceremonies and for pleasure, mastering a number of traditional instruments.

Simpsons in the 3rd Dimension

Greetings to all.

This little clip courtesy of my sister.

A Blogger Quiz? I'm Soaking in It!

I'm afraid to report that I've been stricken down by the latest blogger quiz. Pooh has passed it along to me, and I'm bound by my sacred oath as a former Cub Scout -- we're talking Wolf Den here people! Wolf Den! -- to do my best to answer these questions for God and my country. But not the gays. Scouts don't want nothing to do with the gays. Just single men who like to hang out with young boys in shorts.

Anyway, as we all know, if you don't fulfill your holy responsibility to answer a chain cyberquiz, dire consequences will be visited upon you. Dire.

So here goes....

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18 and find line 4

"One mayoral official, Roger Starr, following the Rand Corporation..."

Believe it or not, that crackling snap of street knowledge comes from Jeff Chang's Can't Stop, Won't Stop: A History of the Hiphop Generation. Kool Herc would be so proud.

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can, what do you find?

Buster Bluth on the receiving end of this move.

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?

Well, "The Daily Show" is on right now. So, Jon Stewart saying the words "I believe God hates us."

4. Without looking, guess what time it is.

Easy -- Hammer Time. It's always Hammer Time. Proper!

5. Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?

Five past Hammer Time. But I think that clock is fast.

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

Jon Stewart saying "Dance Party!"

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?

Taking freedom for a forced march.

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?

Naked pictures of ... Marge.

9. What are you wearing?

Blue t-shirt, blue jeans, blue wool socks. Seriously. It's like Smurf camoflague.

10. Did you dream last night?

Yes, the same dream I always have. I see myself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid, with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at me.

11. When did you last laugh?

When I best laughed.

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?

Paint. What else? Jesus, what a stupid question.

13. Seen anything weird lately?

Lauren Bacall introducting a film montage at the Oscars. Painful.

14. What do you think of this quiz?

Are we there yet?

15. What is the last film you saw?

Just saw Terence Malick's Thin Red Line again on cable. Forgot how good it was.

16. If you turned into a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?

The Batcave. No, the Playboy Mansion. No, wait. The Batcave.

17. Tell me something about you that I don’t know.

I once shot a man ... just fer snorin' too loud!

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt and politics, what would you do?

Reunite the one group the world needs most -- Wham.

19. Do you like to Dance?

Hells yes. I ain't no commie.

20. George Bush.

"What is the best argument against intelligent design? Thank you, I'll take 'Potpourri' for $300, Alex."

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?

Fallopia. (I like classical names.)

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what would you call him?

Testicles, rhymes with Pericles. (See above.)

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?

As a broad? No.

24. What would you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?

"Jesus ... party of thirteen? Your table is ready. Jesus, party of thirteen."

25. 4 people who must also do this theme in their journal.

So many to choose from. I feel like Oskar Schindler. (Too soon?)

Well, I'm going with Mr. Furious, TravisG, tehl4m3, and Sideshow Bob.

Dial M for Murtha

Congressman Jack Murtha (D-Reality) was on "Face the Nation" this morning. The video of his appearance -- which is available, as always, from the good people at Crooks and Liars -- should be required viewing for every single Democrat.

While most congressmen hem and haw about the ever-more-apparent failure of Operation Awesome Kickass™, Murtha just cuts through the bullshit. Admittedly, he has a lot of personal credibility on military issues to take this kind of stand, but some of his framing can be used by anyone out there.

Right off the bat, Bob Schieffer threw out a quote from Gen. Peter Pace insisting that the war is going well. Rather than fall into platitudes about how he hopes it all turns out well, and inserting the federally-mandated statement that he does in fact support the troops, Murtha simply shot back "Why should I believe him?" and then rattled off all the mischaracterizations and miscalcuations that have come out of the administration these past few years. That's exactly the right attitude. They've lied time and time again, and the burden of proof is on them.

Schieffer tried to press the point, noting that this was a Marine general saying this and not some civilian flack. A weaker Democrat would've folded there, of course, but Murtha stuck to his guns. "Why would I believe him?" And then he bolstered his case by citing polls that said the American people and the American troops both want out. Rather than letting it be Democrats against the war, it becomes sane people versus the crazies and the incompetents.

Murtha then employed a little political judo, turning the Republicans' strengths against them. He argued, convincingly, that the only people who want us in Iraq are al Qaeda, Iran and China. As he noted, the war is draining our resources, our manpower, and our standing in the world's eyes, and that only helps those who wish to see us weakened. In other words, he made a strong case that our presence in Iraq isn't helping our national security but is instead hurting it. These arguments have all been out in the blogosphere for ages, of course, but it's nice to see them communicated -- clearly and convincingly -- by someone not writing from their couch.

Absolutely brilliant. Be sure to watch the whole thing.

Update: For added enjoyment, check out this Think Progress post. It seems that John Hinderaker issued a typically idiotic rejoinder to the Murtha appearance, a rebuttal that consisted mostly of going "nuh-uh!" and sticking his fingers in his ears. But the Think Progress folks help him out with facts and figures that back up every one of Murtha's claims. Priceless.

Caption Contest

I hate to keep going to this well, but Bush's trip to India has led to some prime photo opportunities.

So let's do this one more time. Give this photo your best shot.

Lighten Up, Francis

Just when you think the Olbermann-O'Reilly spat can't get any weirder, it does. Crooks and Liars has the video.

Apparently, a caller phoned in to O'Reilly's radio program and mentioned Keith Olbermann's show. No profanity, no threats, just the words "Keith Olbermann." In reaction to this heinous crime, Bill O'Reilly cut off the call and warned that they had the caller's phone number on record, that "Fox Security" would be in touch, and they'd likely turn the matter over to local law enforcement authorities. And if that doesn't work, O'Reilly has promised to tell Mom.

We all know that Fox News is essentially Republican state television, but apparently O'Reilly has bought into that attitude so much that he believes they're also the state police.

George and Condi's Excellent Adventure

I know this will crush both of our readers, but I don't have a whole lot to say about the Monsters of Middle Eastern Destruction tour currently rolling through India and Pakistan. (Except to add that anyone who thought Bush wouldn't use the trip to make a "surprise" stop in Afghanistan is, by all estimates, a complete moron. They've done this over and over again. The surprise would've been if he didn't stop in.)

But other, wiser people have plenty to say. Check out what the Cunning Realist and Carpetbagger Report have to offer. You'll be glad that you did.

Friday Random Ten

There's something truly disturbing about this album. It's not the nagging feeling that Ed recorded a cover of "Day-O!" where he substituted his trademark "Hey-O!", and it's not the likelihood that he busts out a stirring rendition of "The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins" like Leonard Nimoy did on his albums.

Actually, I think it's the fact that the title and the leer on Ed's face that reminds me of Dan Ackroyd's old "Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute" routine from "Saturday Night Live." "No, no, no. Don't try to fight it. You're spending the night with ... Ed McMahon, Male Prostitute!"

We'll pause for a second to let that image slowly sink in.

Alright, you know what this means -- time for the Friday Random Ten. Get out whatever thingamajig you use to play those new-fangled electronic songs, set it on random, and give us the first ten songs that come forth from the spirit world. And, as always, if you're ready to run with the big kids, give us a Coolness Self-Audit as well.

Here's mine:

1. Woody Guthrie, "Hard Traveling" -- It's hard not to think of Woody Guthrie as the original bad-ass. This is a man who had the phrase "This Machine Kills Fascists" written on his guitar, and that was back when fascists weren't figures of speech for some late '70s punk to slag on, but were instead real terrors marching through Europe. That said, this isn't exactly his finest work. 6/10

2. Ike Turner & the Kings of Rhythm, "Tell Me Darling" -- This is a great bit of sultry '60s R&B, with Betty Everett belting out some powerful vocals. I think I'd like this song even more if I weren't afraid that the percussion noises were really Ike beating on Tina with an Italian loafer. 8/10

3. Sebadoh, "Bouquet for the Siren" -- What does indie rock sound like when you let three people sing the vocals together, and none of them can carry a tune? It sounds like pain. 2/10

4. De La Soul, "Let Let Me In" -- A fantastic tune from the often-overlooked De La Soul is Dead. With a driving guitar loop stolen from Lowell Fulsom and some relentless lyrics from the gents, this is a winner. 9/10

5. Minnie Ripperton, "Inside My Love" -- A little bit of '70s disco soul from the Stateside label out of Memphis. This sounds like it should've been playing during a love scene in Shaft's Big Score. And the dirty, dirty lyrics only help the score. 7/10

6. Belly, "Untogether" -- I've always had a soft spot for Tanya Donnelly, ever since I picked up my very first Throwing Muses cassette back in high school. She was overshadowed by Kristin Hersch there, then by Kim Deal in the Breeders, and finally came out on her own here. This may be my favorite from the Star album, a sweet country-folk number with a great slide guitar. Quite nice. 8/10

7. The Afghan Whigs, "Citi Soliel" -- Greg Dulli may be the coolest, drunkest motherfucker in rock and roll today. A friend of mine caught a Whigs show in Boston in the early '90s, and at one point, mid-song, Dulli just punched the bass player in the mouth. They went rolling off the stage, still fighting, only to roll back out and pick up where they left off. Oh, the music kicks ass too. 9/10

8. Bootsy Collins, "The Pinocchio Theory" -- Even though Bootsy bills this song as "the world's funkiest sing-along," I'm going to have to dare to disagree. Bootsy may well be the greatest bass player of all time, but this rambling trip is definitely not his finer work. Maybe you have to do a Scarface-sized hill of cocaine to see the glory of it, I'm not sure. 4/10

9. Self, "What a Fool Believes" -- Yes, a cover of the Doobie Brothers classic. I think my opinion might be warped from too many viewings of the outstanding "Yacht Rock" series, but this semi-electronic rendition always makes me smile. Still, we're talking about a Michael McDonald song. How cool can that be? 6/10

10. Muddy Waters, "Gypsy Woman" -- Some early Chess-era work from McKinley Morganfield. I pretty much love every single thing this man recorded, including an answering machine message set down shortly before his death in 1983. And this is certainly one of them. 8/10

Alright, that gives me a 6.7 on the coolness scale. This isn't the first time I've been in that range, but usually it's Pat Benatar and the Bee Gees dragging me down, and not Bootsy Collins and Sebadoh. What is this? Bizarro World?

Let's see what you've got. Drop your own random ten, with or without the coolness audit, in the comments below. Come on, people, let your freak flag fly! Ed McMahon would want it that way.

Caption Contest

Since you all did a tremendous job with the last caption contest, it seems only fair to reward you with another golden opportunity to let your snark shine.

Have at him.

Funny/True

WASHINGTON, DC—In a press conference on the steps of the Capitol Monday, Congressional Democrats announced that, despite the scandals plaguing the Republican Party and widespread calls for change in Washington, their party will remain true to its hopeless direction.

"We are entirely capable of bungling this opportunity to regain control of the House and Senate and the trust of the American people," Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) said to scattered applause. "It will take some doing, but we're in this for the long and pointless haul."

"We can lose this," Reid added. "All it takes is a little lack of backbone."

The Onion, of course.

Petarded

Peter Griffin from "The Family Guy" made a guest appearance the other night on "Late Night with David Letterman."

Click here to see him run down the night's "Top Ten" list. My personal favorite is #2.

Dereliction of Duty

If you haven't watched the recently released videos of Bush's pre-Katrina briefings, you should move on over to Crooks & Liars for the full story.

There you'll see that President Bush was told -- in no uncertain terms -- that the hurricane would be brutal, that the levees could very well break, and that the damage and death toll could be incredibly high. Confronted with this grim news, the president assured state officials that the federal government was "fully prepared" and would rush onto the scene with supplies and men as soon as the storm hit.

And then, of course, the president clicked off the teevee and went back to his vacation in Crawford. Come on, people. That brush isn't going to clear itself!

When all of the dire predictions came true and it was revealed that the president really hadn't prepared for the storm and really didn't have the situation in hand, the "I Didn't Do It" Boy rushed before the cameras to whip out his patented "I Don't Think Anybody Anticipated..." defense. On September 1st, 2005, President Bush told Diane Sawyer: "I don't think anybody anticipated the breach of the levees. They did anticipate a serious storm. But these levees got breached. And as a result, much of New Orleans is flooded. And now we are having to deal with it and will."

Now, you may remember this patethic cop-out from such previous appearances as "I Don't Think Anybody Anticipated Terrorists Would Fly Planes into the Towers," "I Don't Think Anybody Anticipated a Post-Invasion Insurgency," and, of course, "I Don't Think Anybody Anticipated the Spanish Inquisition." This presidency has wrapped itself in the warm embrace of its own ignorance and incompetence, constantly insisting that nobody could've foreseen any of these problems, when the evidence seems to be that anybody with a fully functioning frontal lobe could've figured these things out. "Bin Laden Determined to Attack inside U.S."? Golly, what could that mean? The hurricane's closing in on New Orleans? Well who knows what could happen?

Over and over again, the president has acted as though his cluelessness somehow excuses the drastic results of his incompetence. He acts as though this is a bad sitcom, where everything falls apart because of Bush's wacky Clouseau-like antics, and the rest of the cast just smiles lovingly at their cute lil' buddy.

I guess you can't blame him, since he's been plucked out of one disaster after another his whole life. No matter how bad he screws up -- going AWOL from the National Guard, running oil companies into the ground, trading Sammy Sosa -- the powers that be step in, dust him off, and put him back on his feet.

Maybe we'll get lucky, and the current powers that be -- in this case, Congress -- will step in, impeach him, and put him out on the street. You know that deep down inside, Bush would love nothing more than to spend all his time down on the ranch, clearing brush, and looking tough. Maybe an early retirement would suit him well.

Caption Contest

Alright, folks, time for another of our Peabody Award-winning caption contests.

Take your best shot.

Why Don't Our Troops Support the Troops?

I don't want to turn this beautiful blog into an all-polls, all-the-time deal, but this new survey from Zogby is a real eye-opener:

An overwhelming majority of 72% of American troops serving in Iraq think the U.S. should exit the country within the next year, and nearly one in four say the troops should leave immediately....

The poll ... showed that 29% of the respondents, serving in various branches of the armed forces, said the U.S. should leave Iraq “immediately,” while another 22% said they should leave in the next six months. Another 21% said troops should be out between six and 12 months, while 23% said they should stay “as long as they are needed.”

That part of the poll is getting wide play in the blogosphere, as evidence that not even the troops themselves buy into the administration's arguments for the Neverending War Story. Those are stunning numbers, of course, but I was even more surprised by this aspect:

The wide-ranging poll also shows that 58% of those serving in country say the U.S. mission in Iraq is clear in their minds, while 42% said it is either somewhat or very unclear to them, that they have no understanding of it at all, or are unsure. While 85% said the U.S. mission is mainly “to retaliate for Saddam’s role in the 9-11 attacks,” 77% said they also believe the main or a major reason for the war was “to stop Saddam from protecting al Qaeda in Iraq.”

“Ninety-three percent said that removing weapons of mass destruction is not a reason for U.S. troops being there,” said Pollster John Zogby, President and CEO of Zogby International. “Instead, that initial rationale went by the wayside and, in the minds of 68% of the troops, the real mission became to remove Saddam Hussein.” Just 24% said that “establishing a democracy that can be a model for the Arab World" was the main or a major reason for the war. Only small percentages see the mission there as securing oil supplies (11%) or to provide long-term bases for US troops in the region (6%).

So the troops don't buy the "freedom on the march" rationale of the administration, but they seem to be clinging to the now widely discredited idea that Saddam had a connection to al-Qaeda. Not even the president is sticking by that whopper anymore, but the troops are still holding tight. I'm not sure if that's a result of their isolation from homefront media reports, or if it's a product of wishful thinking, a need to believe that this is part of a just retribution for the 9/11 attacks.

Regardless, it does help explain why the majority wants to go home. They thought their mission was to topple Saddam's regime and bring him to justice, and that part of the job was over a long time ago.

Hmm. I wonder where they got the idea that their mission had already been accomplished?

Free Fallin'

Get ready for the Terror Color Swatch to go all the way to plaid, because the polls are looking absolutely abysmal for the Administration That Couldn't Shoot Straight. Take the new numbers from CBS News:

The latest CBS News poll finds President Bush's approval rating has fallen to an all-time low of 34 percent, while pessimism about the Iraq war has risen to a new high.

Americans are also overwhelmingly opposed to the Bush-backed deal giving a Dubai-owned company operational control over six major U.S. ports. Seven in 10 Americans, including 58 percent of Republicans, say they're opposed to the agreement.

The troubling results for the Bush administration come amid reminders about the devastating impact of Hurricane Katrina and negative assessments of how the government and the president have handled it for six months. In a separate poll, two out of three Americans said they do not think President Bush has responded adequately to the needs of Katrina victims. Only 32 percent approve of the way President Bush is responding to those needs, a drop of 12 points from last September’s poll, taken just two weeks after the storm made landfall.

Mr. Bush's overall job rating has fallen to 34 percent, down from 42 percent last month. Fifty-nine percent disapprove of the job the president is doing.

For the first time in this poll, most Americans say the president does not care much about people like themselves. Fifty-one percent now think he doesn't care, compared to 47 percent last fall.

Just 30 percent approve of how Mr. Bush is handling the Iraq war, another all-time low. By two to one, the poll finds Americans think U.S. efforts to bring stability to Iraq are going badly – the worst assessment yet of progress in Iraq.

Even on fighting terrorism, which has long been a strong suit for Mr. Bush, his ratings dropped lower than ever. Half of Americans say they disapprove of how he's handling the war on terror, while 43 percent approve.

Yikes. At the rate things are going for him in 2006, President Bush may wind up looking back on 2005 with fond memories.

If You Want to Rule the World ...

...you're going to have to be more competent than this.

Two stories from the Moonie Times. If both are true, how pathetic can the opposition party be?

Example #1:

Democratic Rep. Ted Strickland is running for governor of Ohio, vacating his seat representing Ohio's 6th District. Republicans have targeted the seat as one of their best chances for a pickup this year -- President Bush twice carried the 6th District.

Democrats had hoped that state Sen. Charlie Wilson could keep the seat in their column -- the wealthy candidate had contributed more than $250,000 to his own campaign -- but owing to a mix-up, Mr. Wilson won't be on the ballot for the May 2 Democratic primary.

"Wilson failed to make the ... primary election ballot this week after submitting just 46 valid signatures to the Columbiana County Board of Elections," the Wheeling (W.Va.) Intelligencer reports. "A total of 50 of the 96 signatures he submitted -- obtained in Belmont and Scioto counties -- were ruled invalid largely because addresses were listed improperly or because the resident signing Wilson's petition didn't live in the 6th District."

Mr. Wilson told the Intelligencer that he will run in the primary as a write-in candidate, but only four men have been elected to Congress as write-in candidates in the era of printed ballots, the Associated Press reports.

Can you imagine the other party making such a disastrous mistake? (Insert "They don't even leave the voting to chance" joke here.)

Example #2:

Illinois Gov. Rod R. Blagojevich wasn't in on the joke.

Mr. Blagojevich, a Democrat, says he didn't realize that "The Daily Show" was a comedy spoof of the news when he sat down for an interview that ended up poking fun at the sometimes-puzzled Democratic governor.

"It was going to be an interview on contraceptives. ... That's all I knew about it," Mr. Blagojevich laughingly told the St. Louis Post-Dispatch last week. "I had no idea I was going to be asked if I was 'the gay governor.' "

So politicians are busy. They don't watch a lot of snarky late-night television. But you mean to tell me that nobody on his staff had heard of The Daily Show? Nobody thought to look into this obscure show before allowing interview the Governor? "Obscure" being relatively subjective since the anchor of The Daily Show is going to host the friggin' Oscars.

The Real Deal

Thanks to the great new PoliticsTV, I've finally had a chance to get a look (and listen) at Ned Lamont, the Connecticut businessman who's bravely challenging Holy Joe Lieberman in the Democratic Primary. Take a look for yourself -- this guy is the real deal.

If you like what you see, go to his site to volunteer your time or at least some cash. As Lamont says, his challenge won't jeopardize our holding this seat in the Senate, but it could mean that we finally get to fill it with an actual Democrat.

Don Knotts, R.I.P.

With the recent passing of Don Knotts, it's only right that we all take a moment to remember his greatest role of all time -- President George W. Bush.

(Thanks to Shakespeare's Sister for dredging this up. Wow, is that a great find.)

Film Forum

Well, it's been a whole damn month since we last had a nice discussion of our favorite lesser-known films. So let's get it on.

Before I get into my own rental activity, I want to give some time to a film that's still in theaters -- Eugene Jarecki's documentary Why We Fight. The lovely and talented Malibu Stacy and I just saw it last night, and we were both incredibly impressed.

The documentary is an exploration of the origins and steady growth of the military-industrial complex and the ways in which that relationship has undergirded the war in Iraq. While that sounds like a recipe for a far-leftist Michael-Moore screed, this flick is a lot more measured in its presentation and, as a result, a lot more effective in the end. It's not simply a villification of the current Republican administration (though there are plenty of eyebrows raised there), but rather a look over the past fifty years at the ways in which militarization has been encouraged by both parties. If the movie has a hero, in fact, it's definitely former Republican President Dwight D. Eisenhower, a career military man who well understood the pernicious influence of the "military-industrial complex," a phrase that he coined himself.

The documentary makes good use of archival newsreel footage and contemporary interviews in equal measure -- including a conman/salesman from KBR, the Halliburton subsidiary, who is shown literally performing card tricks and bragging about "collusion" at an arms show. The film is nicely shot and well paced, and it gets its point across without ramming it down the audience's throats. It's just excellent. Be sure to see it when it comes to your town. You won't be disappointed.

Alright, on to the main purpose of this post, here's some of my recent rental activity:

Point Blank (1967): This is a classic slice of Lee Marvin, who stars here as a criminal who's doublecrossed by his partner and left for dead, but comes back to get the money he's owed. This was remade not too long ago as Payback, a fair enough film with Mel Gibson in the lead role, but seeing Marvin work his magic here really puts that film to shame. The other roles are all filled with terrific actors -- John Vernon as the two-timing partner who gives new meaning to "double secret probation," Carroll O'Connor as a mob boss, and Angie Dickinson as the new love interest. Great work all around.

Master of the Flying Guillotine (1975): This was a recommendation I got from iRod, our resident kung fu expert, and it certainly didn't disappoint. Aside from the odd fact that the "hero" of the film is an insane blind bastard who slices the heads off chickens and loud restaurant patrons, while the "villain" is a kind martial arts instructor, the film is pure kung fu goodness. A large portion is essentially Mortal Kombat come to life -- a tournament in which a badass variety of martial artists go Ming Dynasty on each others' asses. Good stuff.


Mean Streets (1973): This isn't exactly obscure or new even to me. But I recently gave this classic flick another viewing, and I was surprised at how new it seemed. I suppose the first time I saw the film, I was really preoccupied by the performance of Robert DeNiro, who made his Scorsese debut here not in the cool and calculating roles he would later play in films like GoodFellas and Casino but as a colossal screw-up. But this time I was struck by how incredible Harvey Keitel was in that kind of role instead. Plus, Scorsese's considerable chops as a director are already on display, with plenty of classic-rock slo-mo camera pans and nice wiseguy dialogue. If, like me, you haven't seen this in a while, I'd recommend giving it another look.

Logan's Run (1976): I'd never actually seen this sci-fi classic before, so I thought I'd take a look. The basic plot is an interesting one -- a utopian future where people are killed when they reach the age of thirty -- but dear Lord is it all ruined by the cheesy sets and the cheesier acting. Michael York is the lead character here, a cop who hunts down the "runners" who refuse to go to their deaths quietly, and it's like watching a lobotomized Ken doll in community theater. Ugh. Apparently, Bryan Singer (The Usual Suspects, X-Men) is working on a remake of this, and if anyone can make the most of a good premise, it's him.

Alright, your turn. The responses last time we great, so let's give it another try: Which lesser-known movies -- forgotten classics, obscure indie flicks, foreign films, etc. -- have been a pleasant surprise for you? Any old favorites worth another look? What should we, the Netflix Members of North America, have queued up?

Requiem for a Lightweight

Keith Olbermann just dropped a thunderous smackdown on Bill O'Reilly.

Mission Accomplished

I'm thrilled to announce that the Global War on Terror has finally closed in on two of the top threats to the Free World -- Henry Rollins and Morrissey.

No word yet on which one of them is the current Number Two Man at al-Qaeda, but it's got to be one of them. We haven't caught a Number Two Man in several weeks now.

National Insecurity

Rasmussen:

Just 17% of Americans believe Dubai Ports World should be allowed to purchase operating rights to several U.S. ports. A Rasmussen Reports survey found that 64% disagree and believe the sale should not be allowed....

From a political perspective, President Bush's national security credentials have clearly been tarnished due to the outcry over this issue. For the first time ever, Americans have a slight preference for Democrats in Congress over the President on national security issues. Forty-three percent (43%) say they trust the Democrats more on this issue today while 41% prefer the President.

The preference for the opposition party is small, but the fact that Democrats are even competitive on the national security front is startling. In Election 2002, the President guided his party to regain control of the Senate based almost exclusively on the national security issue. On Election Day that year, just 23% rated the economy as good or excellent, but the President's Party still emerged victorious.

As anyone who hasn't spent the past five years in a coma will know, Bush has consistently trumped up the foreign dangers we face and consistently puffed up his own record as a danger-facer-downer. No matter what happened domestically -- the NCLB disaster, the 2003 blackout, the economic slump -- Bush's supposed strengths on national security always remained a saving grace at the polls.

But recently, we've seen a steady erosion of Bush's security credentials -- first, with the incompetent handling of Iraq and the inability to get Bin Laden; then, with the botched DHS response to Katrina that showed they couldn't even handle a disaster that they'd seen coming for weeks and even held a dress rehearsal for; and finally, the UAE port security screw-up, and all the light it's shed on how casually the administration handles the nuts and bolts of our national security infrastructure.

It took a while to shake Bush's ill-gained reputation as a strong defender of America, but we're finally here. The American people are starting to think the Democrats are a better option on national security, a trend that's only going to pick up speed as the Fighting Dems take to the campaign trail.

This could be a big year for the Dems. Gabby Hayes big.

Dark Days at the Corner

The Corner, 4:07pm:

ON TOPIC [Ed Capano]

I just want to let all the crunchy cons in Texas know that they won’t be required to wear ties at the NR shindig in Houston.

The Corner, 4:25 pm:

HOW CIVILIZATIONS CRUMBLE [Jonah Goldberg]

This reader is on to something:

The downfall of civilization can be traced directly to the practice of putting televisions in taverns. Men stopped talking to one another. Then they went home and started talking to their wives to whom they hadn’t talked in centuries. This led immediately to wholesale divorce, which in turn led to women in the workplace and juvenile delinquency. Other ills too numerous and horrible to mention followed until men stopped wearing ties so they wouldn’t hang themselves.

Yeah, if I were a conservative these days, I'd probably want to hang myself too. Good thing they ditched the ties.

Friday Random Ten

Because all of us here at LLatPoN are Southerners, I thought it was about time we showcased an album devoted to the true spirit of the region -- Lenny Dee's Down South.

And as we all know, there's nothing more stereotypically Southern than a piano being towed by a speedboat with a Vegas showgirl doing ski tricks alongside. Robert E. Lee would've wanted nothing less. Sure, ideally, there would've been a bassett hound named Flash riding on top of the piano, but as anyone who's ever tried that can tell you, it's a hard trick to pull off.

In any case, the appearance of the Waterskiing Rebs can only mean that it's once again time for the Friday Random Ten.

Fire up the iTunes, set it to random, and let loose the first ten songs that are brave enough to show themselves. And, if you're feeling saucy, Bernaise, then go ahead and give us a Coolness Self-Audit. (Check out this classic edition of FRT for a guide to that. Or don't. See if I care.)

Here's my list:

1. Stereolab, "Transoma Five" -- A mellow bit of background music from the finest English-French collaboration since the completion of the Chunnel. Not their best work, but some passable synthesizing goodness. 5/10

2. Hank Williams, "Settin' the Woods on Fire" -- This is a great bit of classic country, but it's been warped in my mind by the fact that the PBS "American Experience" series used this song for the theme and title of their documentary on George Wallace. Now every time I hear this, I don't hear Hank's dulcid tones but a redneck's cries of "segregation forever!" instead. That's gotta lower the score a bit. 6/10

3. Howlin' Wolf, "Evil" -- The bluesman born as Chester Burnett gives us a particularly gravely-voiced tune here about yet another woman who done him wrong. How come we never hear about all the good things that happen in the love lives of blues musicians? How come we never get to hear the other side of the story? 6/10

4. Radiohead, "Nobody Does It Better" -- This is a live version from the B-Sides collection. Thom Yorke introduces it as "the sexiest song that was ever written," and dammit, I'm inclined to agree. Not even Roger Moore's stiff-assed Bond could rob this song of its sultriness. 8/10

5. Pavement, "Silence Kit" -- I fell in love with Pavement when their first album came out, but everything since then seemed a little like diminishing returns. The Crooked Rain Crooked Rain CD was a bright spot though, and this tune was a big reason why. 7/10

6. Uncle Tupelo, "Acuff-Rose" -- A nice hat-tip from the alt-country kids to their old-country ancestors. The Acuff-Rose label was a prime force in the classic era of Nashville country, and this is a nice tribute. 6/10

7. Mudhoney, "Pump It Up" -- That's right, the masters of Seattle grunge covering an Elvis Costello tune. Somehow it actually works. 9/10

8. Velvet Underground, "What Goes On" -- While the live version from 1969 is probably my favorite rendition of this song, this studio version still has everything I love about VU -- driving guitars, a little background organ, and lots and lots of Lou Reed. They always seemed to do their best when Andy Warhol was somewhere else. Go figure. 8/10

9. Betty Bonney, "Joltin' Joe DiMaggio" -- This is a cute novelty swing song about the Yankee Clipper's slugging streak. However, I hate the Yankees. 3/10

10. Jets to Brazil, "Perfecting Loneliness" -- I really loved their first album, but everything since has been pretty weak. Especially this. Bleh. 1/10

Well, it looks like I drifted from mediocre to craptacular. (Insert your own joke about the Bush administration here.) We all know you can do better than this, so have at it in the comments.

Spin the wheel, raggedy man!

Daaaaaaaaaaamn!

John Avarosis.

Caption Contest

Time for another caption contest.

Release the hounds!

This Dream Date in History

Here's the question: Which historical figure would you most like to spend a day with?

You've got the entire world's history to choose from, anyone dead or alive. (But not zombie. That would be no fun for anyone.)

And you can pick almost anyone you want. In order to prevent President Bush from wriggling away from another tough answer, I'm going to disallow "Jesus" as a valid response here, and we'll declare off-limits all the other celestial deities like "God," "Mohammed," "Buddha," "Ganesha," and, of course, "Heidi Klum."

Also, feel free to set up the scenario. Would you like to spend the day kick-boxing against Gandhi? Cliff-diving with Franklin Roosevelt? Playing the "Match Game" with Charles Nelson Reilly? What?

Make your choice and drop it in the comments.

Cheapshot of the Day

I know it's about Katrina, but this headline in todays' Washington Post made me giggle.

White House To Release Report on Disasters

If the headline really fit the article, it would be a freakin' long article, no?

Compassionate Conservative

"There's only one person who hugs the mothers and the widows, the wives and the kids on the death of their loved ones...Having committed the troops, I've got an additional responsibility to hug." - President George W. Bush, December 2002

"I understand what it means to put somebody into combat. I know what it means to hug mothers and wives." - President George W. Bush, January 29, 2003

"I hug the mothers and the widows of those who may have lost their life in the name of peace and freedom." - President George W. Bush, February 10, 2003

"See, I understand the consequences of war. I understand the risks of war. I understand firsthand, particularly when I go and hug the moms and dads and brothers and sisters and sons and daughters of those who died. " - President George W. Bush, November 17, 2003

"One of my hardest parts of my job is to console the family members who have lost their life. It is a -- it is -- it's a chance to hug and weep and to console and to remind the loved ones that the sacrifice of their loved one was done in the name of security for America and freedom for the world." - President George W. Bush, April 13, 2004

"How do you know his life would have been good?" - President George W. Bush to the mother of a slain soldier, 2004

(Thanks to Shakespeare's Sister for passing this along. I'll be sending her the bill for my blood pressure medication in return.)

. . . Whereas Black Guys Are Named Carl

Mrs. T brought me out of my mid-day torpor (not to be confused with my morning grogginess or my afternoon food coma) with this line from a USA Today article about an olympic skater:

Davis' place in the history books already is secured as the first African American athlete from any nation to win an individual gold medal at the Winter Games. [emphasis mine]

I realize I'm picking a teensy nit here (and perhaps exposing myself as woefully ignorant of racial nomenclature), but don't you have to be from the U.S. to be an African American? Where's Doug Williams when you need him?

(Note: In the course of composing this awesome post, I discovered that the infamous "black quarterback" question Williams was asked is actually an urban legend. My world is in pieces.)

Hail to the Chief

Bush's national poll numbers are bad enough for him, but if you want to get a sense of just how bad he's doing these days, check out Survey USA's state-by-state breakdown of the president's approval ratings.

Right now, there are only six states where the president's approval rating is above 50%. (And it'll come as no surprise to hear that these six states are the awesome, incredibly progressive states of Utah, Idaho, Alabama, Wyoming, Nebraska and Oklahoma.)

What's really stunning is how low Bush's popularity has sunk in some of the states he won in the last election. He's already below the 40% approval mark in Colorado, Missouri, and Iowa. In the über-battleground state of Ohio, where the national GOP's problems are being reinforced by a state-level meltdown, he's down to a pathetic 37%. Ouch.

Notably, all of these polls were done February 10-12, before Dick Cheney shot a 78-year-old man in the face and, most importantly, before the president announced we'd be turning over port security to a company owned by the United Arab Emirates. If the administration keeps up this pace, the president's approval ratings could soon be down there with pedophiles and telemarketers in every single state of the Union.

Maybe he will unite the nation, after all.

The Bride of Frankenstein

The Smoking Gun has officially come up with the most bizarre documents it's ever had -- a sick four-page "Contract of Wifely Expectations" that an Iowa nutcase designed to keep a leash on his wife.

I don't even know where to begin with this one. You'll just have to read the whole thing yourself.

(Thanks to Atrios for finding this and making me feel like the greatest husband in the world.)

Fighting Dems

Nothing gets me more excited about the upcoming election season than the massive wave of veterans running as Democrats.

Now, I like the "Fighting Dems" for a number of reasons -- they'll give the party new perspectives on military issues and foreign policy, they'll be willing to serve as an actual opposition party, and their sheer numbers will do much to counteract the Bush administration's lies about its supposed edge in military matters.

But I also like the stories that surround these guys. And none is a clearer metaphor than that of Tim Walz. Carpetbagger Report has the goods, and the goods are so good, I'm going to reprint it here in its entirety:

Tim Walz, a high school teacher, football coach, and veteran of the war in Afghanistan, toured his community yesterday to let voters know that he's running for Congress in Minnesota's 1st Congressional District, currently represented by Republican Gil Gutknecht. ... Ordinarily, this announcement may not seem like a big deal, but I have a special fondness for Walz, in part because of what helped convince him to get into the race in the first place.

In 2004, Bush visited Walz's hometown of Mankato, and Walz, a command sergeant and 24-year veteran of the Army National Guard, decided to take a couple of his high school students to see their president. They had tickets and valid identification, and went through the metal detectors like everyone else. Walz and his students, however, were ordered to leave — because one of the boys had a John Kerry sticker on his wallet.

Indignant, Walz refused. "As a soldier, I told them I had a right to see my commander-in-chief," the normally jovial forty-one-year-old recently explained to a Democratic-Farmer-Labor Party dinner in the small town of Albert Lea, Minnesota.

His challenge prompted a KGB-style interrogation that was sadly characteristic of Bush campaign events. Do you support the president? Walz refused to answer. Do you oppose the president? Walz replied that it was no one's business but his own. (He later learned that his wife was informed that the Secret Service might arrest him.) Walz thought for a moment and asked the Bush staffers if they really wanted to arrest a command sergeant major who'd just returned from fighting the war on terrorism.

They did not.

Instead Walz was told to behave himself and permitted to attend the speech, albeit under heavy scrutiny. His students were not: they were sent home. Shortly after this Walz retired from the Guard. Then he did something that until recently was highly unusual for a military man. He announced he was running for Congress — as a Democrat.

Who says Bush can't inspire Americans?

President Bubble Boy's hermetically sealed Cone of Ignorance has caused our soldiers enough headaches and bodily harm these past few years, so it's only fitting that it's coming back to bite him in the ass here.

Steady leadership in times of change

Flip. Flop.

Caption Contest

Now that Watertiger is back from her vacation, the rest of us can continue stealing photos from her.

So, time for another caption contest. Have at him.

Balls as Big as Church Bells

The bribery and corruption scandal involving Republican Representative Duke Cunningham is moving to the sentencing stage. As Josh Marshall reports, the prosecution is looking to throw the book at Cunningham, aiming for the maximum sentence of ten years in prison.

From the details of the case, it seems the prosecution should get its wish. I'd realized that Cunningham was thoroughly corrupt, but I didn't realize just how brazen he'd been about it. Check out this tidbit from the AP report:

The prosecution's sentencing memorandum included a copy of a “bribe menu” written under the Congressional seal on Cunningham's office stationary. One column of figures represented the millions of dollars in contracts that could be “ordered” from Cunningham, according to prosecutors. The right column showed the amount of bribes Cunningham demanded in return.

Yes, you read that correctly. A "bribe menu" on official congressional stationary. I'll give you a second to pick your jaw up off the floor.

TPM has plenty of other particulars in Cunningham's string of "unparalleled corruption." Read 'em and weep.

Breaking Newspeak

Surreal. Absolutely surreal.

Thanks to TPM for this delightful reminder that we're officially living in a George Orwell novel.

Port Authority

I'm glad to see the Bush Administration is finally taking port security seriously:

The Bush administration dismissed the security concerns of local officials yesterday and restated its approval of a deal that will give a company based in Dubai a major role in operating ports in and around New York City.

... Several lawmakers, including Representative Peter T. King of Long Island, who is chairman of the House Homeland Security Committee, and Senator Charles E. Schumer, have criticized the administration for its approval of the deal, saying it was done too quickly and without enough scrutiny of the ramifications for security at American ports.

"In the post-9/11 world, there should have been a presumption against this company," said Mr. King, a Republican. He added that people in the intelligence community had told him they had concerns about how the company operated the port of Dubai, one of the United Arab Emirates.

... The investigation did not include background checks on the senior managers of the company or an evaluation of how the company screens its own employees, Mr. King said. "Certainly, you would think they would talk to the Port Authority," he added.

A foreign-owned company based in the Middle East is going to be in charge of port security in New York City, and they're not even running background checks on the management or employees? Awesome.

Now the Great Taste of Worcestershire Sauce in a Shake!

I'm all for some government intervention when the situation warrants it, but shouldn't the market be able to take care of something like this?

Fort's bill, which was co-signed by several other Democrats and at least one Republican in Georgia's GOP-controlled Senate, bans the sale of any "marijuana or hemp flavored candy" in the state and calls for a penalty of up to five years in prison and a $5,000 fine for the second offense.

Next thing you know I won't be able to buy any tobacco flavored candy, either.

Maybe they can do something about the scourge of "Candy Canes" which taste like schnapps.