Saturday, January 20, 2007

Smokes On A Plane

For those who have been a casual observer of the tragic comedy which is professional sports in Atlanta, you may have missed the 3 ring circus which is the Atlanta Falcons. The Falcons have a quarterback named Michael Vick in whom they have invested the lions share of their salary budget ($130 million) - only Peyton Manning has a higher salary.

But there the similarities end. You see - Peyton will be playing tomorrow for the AFC Championship whereas Michael Vick got into some trouble going to visit his new coach (for the first time) after the last poor coach got fired after a 7 - 9 season.

Even before this latest "legal misunderstanding," Vick has run into a number of other issues off the field as well. He was sued in 2005 for knowingly giving a woman herpes. After the last home game he shot the bird to several home fans who were booing another loss. He had a little fine with that one.

But this latest event demonstrates particular concern for the "brains" of the Falcons offense. As the quarterback of a professional football team, you need to be fairly intelligent - memorizing hundreds of plays with the ability to process changes to these plays depending on the particular defense and situation on the field in a matter of milliseconds.

Here's a review of the events in Miami's airport on Wednesday:
[Vick was] "reluctant to turn over his water bottle during the screening process" at Miami International Airport (the athlete was booked on an AirTran flight to Atlanta). Vick subsequently relinquished the 20-ounce Aquafina bottle, which was placed in a recycling bin by a Transportation Security Administration screener. Suspicious as to why Vick hesitated in handing over the bottle, TSA screener retrieved the bottle. There, officials discovered that the bottle's label "contained a seam which separated the top and the bottom of the bottle." The concealed compartment, the report notes, contained "a small amount of dark particulate and a pungent aroma closely associated with Marijuana."
To recap:
(1) He could have smiled and casually tossed the bottle in the trash and nothing would have happened.
(2) He could have not brought liquid in a bottle to an airport after terrorists threatened to blow multiple planes out of the sky in London via liquid in carry-on bottles.
(3) Although I can't guarantee this, but I think you can buy marijuana in Atlanta as well as Miami. I may need to research this before I can commit this fact to our loyal readers, however.

7 comments:

Norbizness said...

I think there's some guy that comments on my site named "Ron Mexico." I asked him if he was Michael Vick, and he wisely demurred.

Thrillhous said...

This guy and Barry Switzer would make great travel partners

sideshow bob said...

There was a good bit on SNL last night about this...I think they may owe you royalties.

InanimateCarbonRod said...

The thing that absolutely shocks me about this story is that Vick was getting on board an Air Tran flight.

Yossarian said...

Is Vick trying to get traded to the Bengals?

Otto Man said...

If you missed the SNL bit on this, check it out at KSK.

Mrs_Thrillhous said...

I can have a little pride yet in my degree as long as he doesn't pull a Shaq and actually graduate.