Sunday, March 26, 2006

Wolverines!

According to the Washington Post's Conservative Blogger of the Week, Ben Domenech, the craptacular '80s flick Red Dawn was one of the greatest conservative movies of all time.

Unless Ben is a communist as well as a serial plagiarist, I'm assuming he'd agree that the absolute greatest conservative film was D.C. 9/11, the movie where President George W. Bush rips his shirt open, flexes his Pectorals-in-Chief, and screams "If some tinhorn terrorist wants me, tell him to come and get me!"

But I digress. Leaving aside D.C. 9/11 -- as well as its intriguing prequel D.C. Cab -- the campy flick Red Dawn stands as a conservative wet dream. And if you doubt its campiness, just click on the poster to the right here and take a closer, creepier look.

As anyone who's watched more than five minutes of late night HBO can tell you, Red Dawn is sort of a reimagining of the Cold War where the Soviet Union is brought to its knees by the Breakfast Club. (Implausible? Not when you realize that conservatives also believe that Ronald Reagan saying "Tear down this wall" was what really brought down the Berlin Wall. Apparently, we just had to ask!)

Anyway, if you're not familiar with the film, there's a hilarious review over at World O'Crap. And if you are familiar with it, feel free to use the comments to weigh in on the eternal debate over who delivered a finer acting performance in the film -- Patrick Swayze, C. Thomas Howell, or the truck radiator they pissed in. Hard to tell.

4 comments:

sideshow bob said...

No wonder the Soviets had such trouble in Afghanistan. If we ever invaded, this would be way diff...oh....never mind.

Studiodave said...

I remember thinking how cool the rag tag army was with their improvised tactics to expell the invaders were. There might me a moral here, but I must get back to NASCAR.

Otto Man said...

Looking over the comments at WO'C, I'm stunned to realize that the guy who played the Cuban commander was Ron O'Neal, the same guy who played the lead character Priest in the blaxploitation film "Superfly." Wow.

I guess i never noticed before because I was so busy wondering why the massive Warsaw Bloc, with its Russian, Polish, Czech, and East German troops, would use the Cubans from the tropics as the spearhead of an attack on the snowy mountains of Colorado.

InanimateCarbonRod said...

There was also a suicide bombing carried off by one of the women -- Jennifer Grey, maybe?

I mean, they had to expell the occupiers, right?